An Artist and a Scholar and a Philosopher

I'm getting 150 points off my art project because I am inept with x-acto knives, and my brother is incapable of making photocopies. Alas. On that note. Neither Gabby nor I (nor anyone else?) won the logo design contest, but they did give complimentary Wawa gift card, a lovely surprise.

Today was the second day of FIRST Philadelphia regionals. It's been waaay better than Balitimore, maybe because I know people better and the right ones are here. Yesterday saw a good hour or so of Ultimate with other teams. I was all weezing and sweaty and not good, but it was a great time and I wasn't the worst. However, I fell asleep immediately after showering, so today saw a really rank jersey (though it's currently gettin' a bath, and I can hear the spin cycle). MOE is rockin' and seeded 5th, though tomorrow's qualifiers will probably see us ranked a lil' higher. It's been a much better event than in Baltimore. There's a more intimate sense of team interactions, prompted mostly by the flying disc and warm weather. Today was chillier, damp, and sorta important, so more teams were inside than out. A few of us toured around Drexel, which made the day soar by with interesting conversation. I'm excited for tomorrow.

I've been looking at the past with the opposite of rosy glasses. First, I'm a pretty terrible friend to really just about everyone. I do not reach out to other people and have become horrendously self-aware when talking. I'm crude and blunt and easily irritated. Second, I was awfully cruel to Jimmy. I can excuse myself as a horny and immature teenager, but in the end it doesn't matter, because those are some of my shameful moments. Third, fuck every other guy I've been with (but not Joe either). I'm a dumbass when it comes to relationships (having never seen a functional one except Meg and Joe and the D.'s & D.'s), and always selling myself short. I'm terrified of being codependent, because I can see where I want it, that I show tendencies towards being ensnared, and that my mom gets the way I never want to be. But I feel like I don't get even get decency. Augh. I'm too little for this, or too old to be so naive.