It must be bedtime

I know that it doesn't happen very often, but on that rare occasion, when somebody manages to say exactly what needed to be said, whether that be a slap in the face or making every thing better for a moment, it's magic.

Sleep deprivation hit this morning, and we all slept in the car on the way to Baltimore. Maybe also sorta kinda on the way home too. Mrs. P. wants to adopt me. Robotics was awesome. It was a lost-tied-won-lost kinda dealie in semi-finals, and exciting. Also got to meet cool (& hot) people and mistaken for a 20 year old and assumed to be left handed. My favorite team was from Walt Whitman High School team 1389, The Body Electric. :D Nobody in my group noticed the homeless people in the Inner Harbor.

I feel so pleasantly warm that it must be bedtime.

and those Other fleeting things

My past few nights have been unreasonable. Dreams have been blooming something lovely, but waking thoughts- fairly on the emotional feminine side. Occasionally, it's that gorgeous rush of full body infatuation, the kind that gets me all tingly. Other times it's a rush of gorgeous bodies, the kind that gets me all hot and uppity. Besides those two exceptions, which are admittedly frequent, it's waves of uncertainty. In six months, my laptop will be gone. My guitar and my record player will also not be here. Most importantly, I will not be here. What will I be like then? Sometimes I get caught up in the detail- flashes of butterfly kisses and denim on skin and little pink scars. Other times I make spider webs of Markov chains, a most likely future, a future I can guarantee, a future that won't hurt. It's unreasonable. Logically, rationally, live momentously. Reflect pleasantly on warm moments, but don't question the moments that are yet to be, or how drawn out that future is.

Found out today it wasn't the guitar string, it was the guitar.

Liberal Fascism kinda sucks, not because of the bias, but because the author is unfocused.

I got a pen pal. I think. It was thrown out half-joking in casual conversation, but damn if I'll hold her to it.

Saw Shannon in the hallway. Waved and smiled genuinely.
Saw Alexa in the hallway. Pretended I didn't.
Siblings of exes and exes of siblings have a very similar sort of reverence to them.

"How am I supposed to pretend I never want to see you again?" Lawd, boy's an asshole. All right, everyone of them, "gonna grow up to be a good kid." Damn the cookies we ate together! I could've kissed him, and I didn't! Thought about it though. He used to make me so deliciously unreasonable. I hate his memes, of all unreasonable things to hate. Alas! Such is the way of life.

Self-Improvement, Summer, and Sidenote

Now that HiQ and robotics are winding down, I'm already planning ahead for my new "self-betterment" projects. Currently (though I may renege), is video game development with the Unreal Developer Kit. In a two pronged project, UnrealScript is heavily based in Java, so I'll be getting my head around that first. I'd also like to improve my Spanish, but that requires a little bit of free time, so I can immerse myself in the language. Noting that I'm seriously out of shape is a little harder to address. Swimming is the obvious answer, aerobic, enjoyable, and full body, but I have no access to a pool (or an ocean, but this one isn't conveniently overcome). I don't have the 60 minutes every other day to work out 'til sweaty and gross that I did with Strength and Conditioning. Plus, I have to finish the mural for Longo, preferably before Spring Break (though this is feasible). There's no way I'd seriously commit to jogging, so I'm left with making up my own home regiment. *wheezy sigh*

This summer, I'm going to make a damned good dam at "my creek." I've got so many plans for warmer (see: overbearingly hot) months. It's gonna be awesome. There's a heckuvalotta things I've never done, and most things on the "to do" list only require some transportation and/or Yankee ingenuity from materials I already have. Also, maybe some parental discretion, but I totally got +100 trust this weekend. Admittedly, some of the things I want to do came from theburiedlife, but not very many. My aspirations are not quite so large (also, I've already done a few on their list). :P

Note to hopeful future jugglers: oranges are not the right size

Quiet in the Grass

PostSecret was excellent this week. There are several people I suspect would send in a secret, and I always hope I'll recognize their handwriting or their fears.

Punctuation has never made me so happy. :]

D&PI is going very well. Bucci is improving my technique. Being in her room, this is the first year I've been consciously aware of the D&PII projects. Kinda makes me wish I'd had extra time to get there. She used me as the example of an art career side tracked by APs, which is almost true, but not quite.

I looked online for the names of the P90x Ab Ripper moves. I found them, and after a little thinking, managed to recall what each one was. Thanks, Was! Going through it sucked, because I felt all full of painful Jell-O after the first three routines. However, after finishing, I felt pretty damn fine. I've also been stretching, which is something I need to get caught up on.

Nominating someone for the memorial scholarship was tough. There are about six girls I wish I could've nominated, and it sucked thinking of a guy who "shows love towards his fellow man." No homo.

I really really really really wish that the brobotics team tore off their sleeves, because Was is jacked! Susan and I nodded in agreement the preponderance of aesthetically pleasing guys on the team, but there are still some others (Cartwright) who are best left with sleeves on.

Though my heart is breaking with rejection, Wasiq politely declined my invitation to prom that I shouted at him from across Doc's room (sad faces ensued). Either way, I'll get to share shirley temples with him in the Drexelbrook Corporate Center, so I can practically pretend. Also, besides that I loved hanging out with Jimmy, prom kinda sucked and post prom was also not super great (except for free Wawa). Right now, my major incentive to go to prom is that my dad is helping to build post prom (d'awww). Oh right, and also the cost, because fuck if I'm paying $75 class dues, dress, shoes, hair, (nails?), to grind on some guy I don't like to some soundtrack that "the prettiest class government" picked out and dance with people that I will effectively not care to see after graduation.

Stairway to Heaven is coming along nicely, though I seriously need some new guitar string. The most difficult part is jumping from bar 5 to D major with pinky on 4 the fourth fret, but the worst sounding part is anything on fret one.

By the end of next weekend, I will have completed 4/27 New Year's Resolutions, with 4 more of the 27 under way. I've decided that I will probably not go through with an additional 3, bringing the total up to 8/24 to be finished soonish. Some of them will have to wait until I'm 18 or it's the summer.